Marriage

David's off again on one of his stupid work trips. Not that he hasn't gotten to see some wonderful places, but this wasn't in his job description some 12 or so years ago nor in the marriage vows-Do you take him for richer, for poorer, in travel and staying home?. Right now though, these trips are so inconvenient. I mean it's not just that he's gone, but it's what he misses. Such as the start of the fabled Candy Season.

Yes there is really a season for that. Homecoming week always ends not with the football game or dance, but the parade for us. Candy lines the streets, literally. Hordes of sugar crazed kids diving for that tootise roll or blowpop or those super sour sweet tarts. Eddie(the dog, least you get the wrong impression) joined me this year as I substituted myself in the game for the missing David. Meredith of course knows just the place to sit,which corner of the route that is. How far to go in the street, or how far a panicked mom lets her(heaven's, the marching band might run her over). But we also as parents, try to make it a learning and growing experience. Okay now you're thinking-not to eat too many sweets, safety in the street, etc. Actually, gave me a chance to really see my little girl grow up some.

A mom and her young daughter were sitting next to us. Eddie managed to get some quality suck up time with them, but there was this cute little girl, hugging her candy bucket, not quite sure what was going to happen. As the marching band goes past, the older kids-you know, the ones with all the previous years experience(I can just see there resume now under hobbies-running for candy at homecoming parades), run up and literally snatch it out of mid air with supersonic reflexes. Poor girl didn't have a chance. So after a few floats went past, I hollered at Meredith-only thing you can do as the pom pom shaking drowned out a normal yell, to come here for a moment. I kindly whispered in her ear that she might help out that little girl with her candy harvest. Heck, most of what we get goes uneaten, just sitting as a trophy on the table to this year's hunt. I was so proud as I watched Meredith grab and then divide what she got between the two of them. Or she would jump in front of a thrown piece on the ground so that the little girl behind her had a chance to stoop down and get it herself. Few times she also would step back suddenly to let the flying candy drop in a certain candy bucket instead of attempting that mid air flying catch being demonstrated by all the older kids.

What I went away with was the sense that I was loosing my little tomboy(that's another story) and seeing a young lady emerge. Sucks that they grow up, doesn't it?

Back on to the marriage part of this whole story. Ever heard of the couples that boast of never being apart for a day in 57 years of marriage. OMG, I don't think I could do that. Don't get me wrong, every time that David leaves, I'm lost. I count the days till he gets back. But on the other hand, there's no waiting in the AM to get in the shower, it's dinner for two not twelve every night and I don't have to throw away any wet paper towels sitting on the kitchen sink. Those couples without a day apart, let's talk here. She more then likely didn't work out of the house. He worked his 9-5 job. Once the kids were old enough for school, she sent the entire family away for the day. Okay, yes she did have chores-laundry, cleaning, sewing. But let's face it, she had an 8-10 hour vacation from her hubby every single day of the work week. Don't tell me she didn't look forward to it? When the hubby had a day off for what ever reason, didn't she feel like he was under her feet, disrupting the natural flow of life as she knew it?

I honestly think that the apart time, makes things together better. Granted after he's gone for 2 weeks, it's hard to get out of that rhythm of just the two of us. We get a little short with each other and but then notice that we do tend to take each other for granted. Maybe that's where the being apart comes in handy. We see in the clear light of day that we aren't as independent as we thought. Is it cliche to say that the oneness of marriage makes us whole. In finishing each other's sentence or thought or anticipating the other's next move, that we are the two pieces of the puzzle that creates the finished product. Beyond being hokey here, marriage is about finding that person who fulfills us. And I am ever so thankful that a certain guy started hanging around the garden center making up excuses to come by and see me. Life certainly would not have been the same without him.

Gotta run, Tuli and her faithful son Moose, found a hole in the fence and gotta go rescue the cows next door. Ah herding dogs.......

Later gators---
C