Wednesday, October 24, 2007

The dogs

Unless you have had a chance to wander through the website of Foggy Bottom, you might not have a clear understanding of what exactly my chaos is. Take a moment and do wander. My mind does it alot, but that's a story for another day. For a small glimpse into my world, let's talk about this morning, early early this morning for example.

We built a new house about 4 years ago. Not really built, it's a modular stick built kind. Love it too. We designed it to compliment our lifestyle. It's got an open floor plan, easy to move around in. I'm claustrophobic, so lots of windows. And still not a curtain on one of them. We are on 40 some acres, if someone is serious about peeping in, they have to get past Max and the ducks first. Anyway, our bedroom has these large windows on two sides-west and north. David and I can lay in bed and watch the horses in the pasture, northern lights in the winter and the moon set in the morning. And that's where we start at....

What do they call it, a waning moon? Whatever it is, it's huge by the time it hits the western horizon. I can walk about the without running into anything because the house is just illuminated by the moonlight. There is of course nothing that can be done about stepping on the roge bone or slimy toy, but that's life in Chaosville. Anyway, I went to bed last night with great hopes of sleeping soundly till the alarm went off at 6ish. Like many people, I wake up before the alarm, but always ask God to let it be just a minute before the alarm, not 1/2 hour or more. But the moon had other ideas. I woke up at 4am this morning, to be greeted by the largest moon in history. Orangish, round and very very bright. Now I'm blind, not really, but without my contacts, everything is just a blur. So the scene is set. Me seeing only haze, super bright headlight like beam shining in the window, and once I moved, that was it - it's all over.

So how many dogs do you normally sleep with? I had a person come and spend the weekend with us a while back. Her reaction of - they just keep coming out of nowhere-- is an understatement. The younger dogs of the house sleep in crates in the study area right next to the kitchen, that includes Meredith's little toy dogs-the pom and two brussel griffons. Alec has his collies and Farmer Fred sleeping with him and last but not least is the herd in my room. We used to have a nice full sized bed-nothing wrong with that. Cozy for a married couple, a little tight with a lab sleeping in the bed with you and down right unbearable with anything else added. We received a king sized bed awhile ago from someone who thought we were nuts not to have one. It's okay, just means more room for the dogs in the bed and they usually plant themselves right between the hubby and I. I wave good night to him from my side and roll up in the blankets. Right now, with David traveling, Meredith likes to sleep with me. Not bad, unless you don't like a 10 yr old child rolling on you at night, slapping you in the face as she flops around, sleeping cross ways on the bed and then consider her dogs that have to come sleep with us. So now here's the picture-two adult collies-one rough and one smooth, three adult female cardigans, and the couch slug(the lab). Not including the three dogs that sleep in crates-one who eats the mattress pad and remotes, the one who sleeps on top of you if you let me out at night and the large German Shepherd who is scared of the three girls in the room. Yes now you're ready for what happens when the moonlight wakes me up at 4am.

David gets up at 4:30 on most mornings. I sleep until he russles me up at 5:30 or 6. But this time around it's 4am, I'm looking forward to 2 more hours of sleep and he's out of town. As soon as my eyes snap open to the glare of the headlight moon, it's like a horror movie. You know the one with the psycho doll, his head swivels around and his eyes open. Well that's what the dozen or so eyes attached to the chaos crew do also. I try as best as I can with a bad back to pretend to just roll in my sleep but it doesn't work. They know I am awake. And then, of course, I gotta go to the bathroom. At that instant, the whole room errupts. Legs flying all over, bouncing on the gifted king sized air bed and using it as a springboard to get to the floor before I can stand up. Remember I only see in shadows right now, so I don't see the couch slug still laying on the floor, whom I trip right over. I'm falling towards the dog crate which contains Moose, a fairly large cardigan boy. What I can see is the whites of his eyes glowing as I get closer to impact. But saved by the bell, as Claire the rough collie sweeps past, bouncing me in the opposite direction. Feeling like a pinball in a very weird machine, I make it to the bathroom. But now it's not without an audience, all of them wanting to know if it's their turn to go out?

Needless to say, they didn't get to go out, which one of them voiced their opinion on that by creating a puddle in the bathroom. And needless to say, I didn't get back into that lovely REM sleep but just dozed, waiting to spring to action once again, just seconds before the alarm went off at the correct time.

But guess who slept through it all-darn kids.

So there is a small glimpse into my chaos. Just wait, it only gets better. Someday I'll tell you about the bedpost, the concussion and the couch slug.

Later gators--

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